


nothing is heavier than the dead body of someone you loved

by thedreamsteam



Category: 1917 (Movie 2019)
Genre: 5+1 Things, Angst, Blindness, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:27:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23505364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedreamsteam/pseuds/thedreamsteam
Summary: Blake was a new soldier. Anybody could tell from the way he walked to the way he smiled, bright and happy to be here. He couldn’t stop himself, smiling when he sees all the soldiers together, chattering.or,five times tom thinksi love youand one time he says it
Relationships: Tom Blake/William Schofield
Comments: 16
Kudos: 55





	nothing is heavier than the dead body of someone you loved

**Author's Note:**

> hh im so sorry i've just tried to get this out before april 6th
> 
> shout out to spencer because i'm fucking sorry
> 
> also!! shout out to stasia bc she had to endure me sending her like 40 images of white boys i like while trying to write this
> 
> uhh title is from the 1917 script bc this is the one chance i'll have to use it
> 
> i'm sorry lol

> Just stop your crying, it's a sign of the times

**1.**

Blake was a new soldier. Anybody could tell from the way he walked to the way he smiled, bright and happy to be here. He couldn’t stop himself, smiling when he sees all the soldiers together, chattering.

He’s sent to join him, but he has no clue whose even the right one. Some of them are assholes, clear as day, while others have hidden that part, only to come out when he’s too deep. He’s looking, when one of them comes up, standing in front of him.

“I can tell you’re a bit lost. Do you want me to show you the way around camp?” He asks, voice soft, and Blake nods his head, following the man as he walks away from the others.

“I’m Tom Blake.” He offers after a moment, holding out his hand. The man takes it, shaking for a moment before dropping it.

“I’m William Schofield.” He says, and that’s all he says, still walking. Blake can’t help but feel a little worry for how far they’re out, until William stops, standing beside a tree. “So, this is where I’m usually at, unless I’ve been called by a higher-up to work. None of the soldiers come out here, so if you want, this can be where you stay too.”

“That’d be nice.” He grins, William giving a small smile back. He continues after him, as Will points out the mess tent, the medic tent, and where you can get water to clean. He nods along, and it’s only when they’ve looped back to the tree that he’s realized that Will asked him a question.

“What? Sorry, I kinda zoned out.” He smiles sheepishly, and William gives a small smile.

“I was just wondering if you had any questions, or anything to say?” He asks, and Blake is thankful his brain catches up with his mouth, because he almost asks where can he piss, but instead he thinks it and says he doesn’t think he does. “Good, because I think I’m about to pass out.”

William sits down in front of the tree, resting his back against it as Blake sits down beside him, eventually moving his body into a sleeping position. William falls asleep soon enough, and Blake stares at him for a moment, and the only thing he can think of is ‘I love you.’

**2.**

William was shaking his shoulders.

“Huh?” He says, looking up at him.

“I found a place for us to go.” Is what William says, and when he looks around, he can see everything’s wet, but when he pats himself, he’s dry, and a wet patch is nowhere to be seen. Before he can even ask, William’s already continued. “I put my cloak over you, so you wouldn’t get wet.” His cheeks redden and he looks away, leaving Blake to look up at him with a soft smile.

“Thank you.” He says, and when William looks back at him, his face reddens again and he looks away, waiting for the boy to get up before leading him to the spot.

He smiles at the back of the man’s back, almost joyful at the fact he did that. Clearly, that means that Will doesn’t hate him, right? God, he loves this man, doesn’t he?

**3.**

Will nearly got shot.

“You’re so stupid!” Tom nearly shouts, shoving Will. “You didn't have to shove me out of the way so that you could try and get shot instead! You could’ve just shoved me and stayed where you fucking were!”

“I didn’t want you to die! Is that too much for you to understand?” Will exclaims, glaring at Tom. “I’m sorry I shoved you so that you wouldn’t get hurt! Would you have just rather you got shot?”  
  
“Yes! I would rather the world exist with you in it than without you! It’s better off without me.” Tom just almost yells, and Will stops, staring at him.

“What did you just say?” Will’s breathing, hard, and Tom isn’t able to speak. “Tom, did you just say you’d rather die if it was one of us?” Tom manages to nod, and suddenly he’s wrapped in Will’s arms. “Don’t you ever fucking say that again, alright?” Tom nods then, and Will grips him tighter.

 _I love you_ , he thinks, but Tom doesn’t say it. Instead, he just grips Will back and cries.

**4.**

Will’s trying to help him sleep.

It’s night time, and they’re not being forced to work anything, so they’re sat by Will’s tree, and he can’t sleep. He’s talked out loud for over half an hour at this point, and he still doesn’t feel any less tired than before. He’s nearly talked himself out of a voice, though, so he quiets, staring up at the stars.

“Can’t sleep?” Will finally asks after a moment, and Tom’s sigh answers his question. He can feel Will shifting, but he tries not to question it. He tries, but he doesn’t even know if he wants the answer. Will starts to speak, though, and he focuses on that.

“They went to sea in a Sieve, they did, in a Sieve they went to sea.” Will says it slowly, but his voice calms Tom, enough for him to finally close his eyes for the first time in an hour. Will continues talking, either telling him the same thing over and over or telling him something new, but he can’t tell at this point. All he can hear is the soft sound of Will’s voice, trying to help him sleep.

 _God, I love you_ , he thinks, but he doesn’t say it aloud, already falling asleep.

**5.**

Tom’s gone blind.

Not permanently, obviously, but for a while. Some of the dirt got into his eyes, and he washed them the best he could, but he can barely see, needing Will to help him get everywhere. That’s really helpless, isn’t it? Not even being able to get from the river to their tree on his own. 

Will doesn’t mind, though. At least, it seems like. He can’t see if he does or not. Whenever he tries to ask, WIll just tells him to shut the hell up.

He’s been allowed to not have to do anything for the next two days, though, and so has Will. He doesn’t even try to think about that coincidence, and instead just decides to thank whoever that they got off together so he’s not just stuck beside their tree alone.

“Have you ever read Hamlet?” Will asks after an hour of them sitting silently together, and Tom shakes his head, because he was never interested in anything with Shakespeare. But, Will does sound happier when he said the title, so when Will asks if he minds if he reads it out loud to him, he says he doesn’t.

“It’ll give something to pass the time.” 

So Will begins, and he does a different voice for each character, clearly showing when which one speaks. It gives Tom something to focus on, and they’re on act 3 before he yawns, which is when he can hear Will lightly close it.

“Do you wanna stop now?” He asks, and he can just barely hear the worry, and he so wants to respond _I love you_ , but he just thinks it and tells him only if he wants to. So they continue, and he can’t help but think that thought over and over again.

**+1**

The blood is warm on his hands. So is Will, whose body he’s collapsed against, who’s helping him breathe, in and out. 

“We have to stop the bleeding.” He hears, before the dressing is pressed onto his wound, spreading the pain harder. He’s screaming before he knows it, telling him to stop. It hurts, so much, and if he could, he’d be crying, tears streaming down his face. He can hear Will moving behind him, tensing his arms under him. “It’s alright, it’s going to be alright. We’re going to stand up.”

“Yes. Yes.” He moves with him as much as he can, standing up when Will pulls him up. He tries, so, so hard, but the pain pushes outward, moving through his body, and he yells. “No! I can’t. I can’t.”

They drop together, and Blake’s left breathing heavy, and Will’s hand is over his wound, as if he wishes he could heal it with a single touch. 

“We have to get to an Aid Post.” Will says, quietly. He’s staring at Blake, tears already forming in his eyes.

“I can’t.” Blake replies, looking down at his wound. The smell is starting to waft towards him, and he sniffles.

“I’ll carry you. It isn’t very far.” Will softly says, staring down at him.

“Just bring a doctor here.” Blake turns, looking at Will instead as Will desperately looks around.

He can see the panic in the man’s eyes, and he can’t help to finally tear up, because here’s the one true friend he’s had in this entire war, who he doesn’t even get to see again. The one who's helped him with anything he’s asked, and who’s been so goddamn nice when he doesn’t have to.

“I love you.” is what says, the simplest way to explain all the thoughts going through his mind. Will’s stopped looking around, and he’s instead staring down at him, shock written plain all over his face. A moment passes, and as Blake’s face is getting paler, tears drop on his face and Will’s crying, clutching him only a little harder.

“I love you so much.” is whispered into his ear, and a kiss is pressed to the top of his head. “So, so much.”

He finds Will’s hand, almost pushing on his wound, and he rests his hand over it.

“Talk to me.” He says after a beat, when Will’s crying has subsided, if only a little. He can feel the man look at him, so he continues, before he can open his mouth. “Tell me you know the way.”

“I know the way. I’m going to head south east until I hit Ecoust. I’ll pass through the town and out to the east, all the way to Croisilles Wood.” Will speaks softly, as if he’s scared that if he speaks too loud, Blake will die.

“It’ll be dark by then.” He says faintly, eyes closing.

“That won’t bother me... I’ll find the 2nd, I’ll give them the message, and then I’ll find your brother. Just like you, a little older…” Will stops.

Blake isn’t breathing. He pulls his hand away, sucking in a breath as he gently pulls it out from underneath Blake’s hand. His hand is warm, still, but only barely. He wants to get up, knows he needs to, but all he can do is stare at him.

He’s been in love with him since the moment he met him, yet it’s only in his dying moments he finally admits? He can’t tell if it’s a cruel trick by God or someone else, but his chest heaves and he leans down, pressing his forehead to his.

He pulls back after a moment, leaning back on his knees to wipe his eyes. They’re red, he can already tell, but he ignores them, moving closer to Blake to look through his bag.

He pulls the rings off his hands first, shoving them into a pocket where they’ll never escape, no matter what happens. Slowly, he goes through everything, keeping everything he thinks Joe would want. Everything else either stays with Blake or goes into his pocket.

Eventually, he leans back, wipes his eyes, and stands up. He has to do this. For Blake.

“I love you too.” He whispers to himself, and the wind carries it away.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm on tumblr @willlamschofield


End file.
